Category Archives: South America

Olivenca: A Neverending Journey to the Middle of Nowhere

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Olivenca is a tiny beach town about 14km outside of Ilheus on the East coast of Brazil. We spent a night there as a quiet stopover on the way up to Carnaval in Salvador. We figured it would be a good way to split up the bus ride: pick a place on the coast half way up, spend a day, and then continue north!  The bus to get to Ilheus was only 16 hours, which was nothing compared to previous bus times. It was still quite a haul, but Adam chimed in with “nothing will beat the 22 hour one we were on before!” True…


Just to GET to the rodovaria (bus terminal) took 2 hours. We managed to perfectly time our trip to coincide with Rio rush hour and crawled through the city on the sweltering bus. Might I mention that this bus did NOT like the idea of first gear. Every time we slowed to a stop and then started up again the bus would lurch forward and literally send people bouncing out of their seats. Real fun.  By the time we got to our long distance bus, I was already over the idea of sitting down; nonetheless, we loaded up and set out.

The lonely planet guide told us the trip should be 15 hours, but the sign at the front of the bus said “Ilheus 12:30,” which gave us about 16 and a half hours: probably a more realistic end time considering South America’s strict policies on “being on time”.  It was 9am when the bus stopped for breakfast. Neither Adam nor I ate anything substantial because we were scheduled to arrive in a couple hours. We had a fruit cup and a mini sandwich in our bags and figured we’d grab a big lunch when we arrived. 
After killing 4 hours of reading and chatting, we started getting peckish. It was 1:00pm so we had to be arriving soon… Not the case.

At 3:00 we stopped again and both of us rushed off the bus to eat any food possible at the bus station. There was no sign in the place that indicated where the hell we were, and any road signs on the hwy kept pointing towards Salvador.  Guess there’s nothing else to do but wait.

At 5:00pm I had a moment where I couldn’t actually remember any part of my life where I HADN’T been on a bus. It’s one thing to be told you have a 20-hour bus ride ahead of you. You prepare, mentally or otherwise, you aren’t worried about where you are or why you haven’t stopped yet. HOWEVER, when the sign says 12:30, and it’s now 5:00 you start to go very loopy. Adam was nearly convinced we were going to Salvador instead of Ilheus. Then we got very concerned that perhaps the sign meant 12:30AM and we had to spend another 7 hours on the bus!
  I remember looking out the window and feeling my sanity slip. The scenery was becoming denser, the jungle more tropical, and the whole thing felt like a series on “Planet Earth”. All of my thoughts were strange narrations in a David Attenborough voice. “On the surface, the Amazon Rainforest is peaceful, but under the canopy of leaves there are species unimaginable to the human mind; flora and fauna are in abundance in this vastly diverse ecosystem…” For the next 45 minutes every word that came out of my mouth was in a soft, manly, British accent… I need more sleep.



2 and a half hours later I turn to Adam. “guess your theory on ‘nothing can beat our 22 hour bus ride’ was wrong”. We had been on the bus for 23 hours. It’s dark. Our hopes of lying on the beach all afternoon were shattered.

Finally our bus pulls in to the Ilheus station and I almost cry.  Screw getting on a city bus to Olivenca, we’re taking a cab. 
We DO manage to book a bus to Salvador (thank God), and a $40 cab ride later we pull up to a large bungalow on a few acres of land that will be our home for the next 36 hours. 
The couple who check us in don’t speak a WORD of English, and look a little put off that neither Adam and I “fala Portuguese”, but they are sweet, show us to our room, give us a key and indicate they are going to bed. We head into town to grab dinner and call it a night by 11:00. Not exactly how I anticipated my day going.

The next morning we woke up and realized we were the only people staying at this giant hostel. The lady who ran it woke up bright and early and had a buffet breakfast made for us in the dining hall. Because this was our lazy day, we just sat there, ate food, drank a whole thermos of coffee and chatted for hours about nothing. Then down to the beach! We found this big area right on the beach that had tables and umbrellas all the way down to the water; people were everywhere, even in such a small town, and they had a large group of young girls performing traditional Brazilian dances on stage. So we set up camp, had a caipirinha and watched the performances.

After a couple hours and some lunch we walked back through town. The whole thing was very quaint, with cobble stone streets, little restaurants on either side and only a couple blocks squared to make up the whole town. 
We stopped in at an Internet cafe to check emails, and sadly heard some bad news. Adam’s grandfather, at age 90, had passed away peacefully the day before. Although this wasn’t sudden news, it made for a sad afternoon for both of us. So my condolences to the Klauwers’ family; I wish you all the best during this hard time. 
From that point on, we didn’t feel like doing anything. We went back to our pousada, listened to some music, played a couple games of pool and reminisced about our grandparents. It turned into an unexpectedly nice afternoon. We played pool all through the afternoon, and then again at the restaurant for dinner. Finally it was off to bed early, so we could be up for the bus at 7am and head towards Carnaval!

Valentines Day in Rio

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I had the most wonderful Valentine’s Day: Adam, not so much. After two delayed days, our city tour finally took us up Sugarloaf Mountain.  The day was beautiful and cloudless! When Andre arrived he said our tour would be going on a little later than planned, but that we would be having a fabulous buffet churrasco after the mountain and that it would be a great time. I was excited, but unfortunately, Adam already had a date at 12:30, that was much more important than hanging out with me. So, we went our separate ways and I left for the tour while Adam stayed behind. The tour was supposed to end about 1:00, so we agreed to meet back at the hostel sometime around there, although I had no problem waiting if Adam was a little behind.

So off I went in the van to Sugarloaf! In total there were 7 of us, 4 Brazilians, 2 other Canadians and myself. I was thrilled that there were other English speakers on the trip, since I was dreading another tour entirely in Portuguese. Katelynn and Scott, are both from Toronto and they are the most wonderful couple we’ve met on the trip so far! (If you guys read this, it’s true, we are so glad to have met you! Hopefully our paths will cross again!). So naturally, I clung to my fellow Canadians throughout the afternoon. I don’t remember any of the stats about Sugar Loaf Mountain, except that it took 3 minutes on the gondola to reach the top (and even then I’m not sure If that was for the first peak, or the second). But I do know it was STUNNING! The view of the city was gorgeous. It looks down over Copacabana, and across to the Christ the Redeemer statue. Another beautiful 360 degree view of Rio checked off my list!

I knew I would get along with Katelynn and Scott immediately when a quarter of the way through the trip they suggested grabbing a beer from the concession before going further: so we did. Immediate best friends.  Then we caught up on each other’s travels, and took touristy photos from every angle possible.  It was a wonderful time!

After Sugarloaf it was time for the Churrasco (Brazilian BBQ).  This was the most elaborate buffet I have been to yet! A plethora of barbequed meats, salads, starches, seafood, fruit platters, sushi, desserts, It was all available.  So, I crashed Katelynn and Scott’s romantic lunch, and was third wheel to a couple I met only hours earlier on Valentines Day.  Impressive, I know.

Once the BBQ was finished, I was dropped back off at the hostel. It was about quarter after 3 and I felt bad that Adam was probably waiting for the better part of 2 hours for me; however,  when I walked through the front door, the receptionist handed me a note: “Hey Hil, still out, be back as soon as I can”  Uhoh!



So Adam’s Valentines Day plans actually started a day earlier. We were running errands after the Favela tour – i.e. I needed to get 4000 types of mosquito repellant so I don’t get eaten alive in the Amazon. While we were at the pharmacy, Adam figured he would pick up Malaria pills that he didn’t get in Canada before he left. No big deal, I did this is Bangkok and saved myself hundreds of dollars! What we then found out, unfortunately, was that Brazil and Thailand have different laws on prescription medicine. In Thailand you can probably get heroin handed to you over the counter for $1, in Brazil, prescriptions are needed for everything, or so we thought, just like in Canada.

So the pharmacist sent us to the hospital a few blocks up to speak to a doctor. Ya, like our Portuguese is good enough to figure this out at a hospital! Nonetheless, off we went.  We knew we were in trouble when even the receptionist didn’t know what we meant when we handed her a piece of paper with “I need a prescription for Doxicycline” translated into Portuguese. Luckily, a random man nearby spoke English well enough to help us out. Turns out, we were in the wrong place.  “You need to go to emergency,” he said. “No, no” we explain, “Adam doesn’t HAVE malaria, we just need a prescription”. Still, need to go to emergency. So we walk over to emergency and can’t even figure out how to grab a number to wait in line! We’re never going to make it. Then all of a sudden the man from earlier comes in and wants to make sure we’re all right.  Everyone in Brazil is SO nice. He helps us through the whole process, and we sit and wait to be called.

Once we get into the room, the doctor has to go get a translator who can help us out. We explain our situation and the doctor shakes her head. “No, we only TREAT malaria, not write prescriptions. If yo need one you have to go to the free clinic a few blocks away; unfortunately, it closes at 4:00 which is three minutes ago.” Luckily, she tears up Adam’s form, so he doesn’t need to pay $280 just to SEE the doctor!

So thus begins Adam’s Valentines Day. He got up early to be at the free clinic by 8:30. No one could write a prescription there until the doctor arrived, so he makes an appointment for the only available time 12:30 – thus his previous engagement as mentioned earlier. By 3:15, when I got back from my awesome day of touring and eating, Adam was STILL waiting at the clinic. I went down to meet him, and we crossed paths a couple blocks from the hostel. I look inquisitive; Adam shakes his head. “No prescription”.  Apparently, he had spent the better part of the day staring at a white wall, watching patients go in and out of rooms, until finally he asked about his doctor. “Nope, she’d left the hospital to work at her other job across town”. Fabulous. We then heard there was a malaria injection that was quick and easy. We asked about that, and “yes!” they could do it. So Adam gave his passport and information, we waited a couple minutes, then the nurse turned to us “sorry, we ran out for the day. We have yellow fever shots only now. Come back tomorrow”. Unfortunately, we had a 15-hour bus ride to be on in a couple hours, so we’d have to try in Salvador: we left defeated. Productive day. We spent the remaining hours of Valentines Day stuck on a bus, headed to God knows where, 15 hours north of Rio.

In the end, it turns out you can “trick” pharmacists, when you drop the word prescription from your note, and translate Doxycycline to the Portuguese equivalent “Doxicilin”.  Then, they will freely hand over the drug! We later bought the pharmacy in Olivenca out of drugs. The rest were easily obtained in Salvador. Thank goodness!

Rocinha Favela

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On Monday morning, Adam and I set out for a tour of the largest favela in Brazil (population wise). I really wasn’t sure what to expect. I knew that favelas are areas where the very poor live, for cheap, and that the living standards are exceedingly sub-par. But to be honest, I had little other expectations. Turns out, I found this to be the MOST eye-opening and interesting tour I’ve been on yet.

There are over 1300 favelas in Brazil, and a total of 59 million people exist within their borders. In Rio alone, a little over 10% of the population lives in a favela. Rocinha Favela has a total of 300 000 people, and is considered the largest in all of Brazil as far as numbers… and we were about to explore it.

Our tour bus dropped us off at the military base that was stationed at the foot of Rocinha. Our guide told us we would be taking moto-taxis to the top, then slowly walk our way down as a group. Now… for anyone who knows my history with motorcycles, you would understand that this was already a terrifying experience for me. Why I choose to only ride sketchy motorcycles in countries that have zero traffic laws is beyond me; but here I was, on the back of a motorcycle, with a random local, speeding through the windy streets, barely avoiding buses and pedestrians, taking me deeper into the most dangerous neighborhood in the city. 
The streets were overcrowded and the shops were simple and cheap, yet I found it very interesting watching the bustling life as it went by. When we arrived at the top, I assumed we would take the same route down and learn the history of the area along the way. Yes, the place was clearly an over-crowded, dodgy neighborhood, and yes I was still excited to hear about the tour, but, I had no idea what I was in for.

Our guide congratulated us all for not dying on the motorcycles on the way up.  Hooray!  Then she told us we were not, by any means, allowed to take our cameras out for the first part of the tour. Once we got IN to the favela we were free to do as we pleased, but the people here wished to remain anonymous; if their photos were taken at an entrance or an exit to a favela path, it would make it easier for the military to track them down. First of all, I already thought we WERE in the favela. Secondly, the reason no one wanted to be identified, was that the majority of favela folk are either drug dealers, or into some kind of illegal activity; and so, our guide also warned us not to take any photos of people with guns, or bombs that we saw along the way. Well this sounds safe!

Apparently, the section of road that we drove through was considered the VIP area of the favela. The fact that there was a ROAD, with CARS on it was a major hint. This area has cheap restaurants, some stores, and even a fast food chain called “Bob’s Burgers”. So we walked about a half block down the street, before we turned down a side street and ended up on our first path. This was no street really; it was hardly a sidewalk if you really think about it.  It was a path, partially paved (and those parts were NEVER even) just a few feet wide, that led us deep into the neighborhood.

Now, I know I will never be able to give the place justice as far as a description, because the place is unlike anything I’ve ever seen, but I’ll try. The path wound its way between large concrete structures that are considered “homes”. The families that live there normally build these homes by hand. The problem with Rochina is that it is sandwiched between a giant mountain and the Tijuca forest; and so, there is no more room to expand outwards. Thus, the place has begun to work its way upward. For example, the higher your property, the better your position in the favela. Rent at the base of the hill (the entire favela is positioned on a hill) goes for about 100 reais/month ($60). At the top, the same building is 700+ reais/month.  For some perspective, the average family income is 900 reais/month: HOWEVER, if you can find a place to build your own home, you are free do to so, since the land is centered on a first come, first serve basis. Thus, someone will build a home, then, they will sell their roof to another man, and he will build his home on top of the first, then that second man will sell his roof to another man, and so on, until the building has 4 or 5 levels of families living in it. Utter chaos! And these homes are made of anything!! Concrete, tin, cardboard, you name it, it’s probably fashioned into a wall somewhere in Rocinha!

In addition, no family pays for any kind of cable, Internet, or electricity. They do their own wiring of the house and street, and manage to rig the power meter to say zero. The government has given up on taxing them, and has consequently raised the rest of the population’s taxes to make up for the billions and billions of lost dollars.

Another thing you should know about favelas is the families. On average, there are 7 or 8 children per household. Then, each of those children, start having their own kids at 12, 13, or 14 years old.  We met a man there who was 28 years old and already had 2 grandchildren!  Each of the children grow up with dreams of becoming famous movie stars, or dancers, but in reality, 9 out of 10 will remain jobless and living in favelas their entire lives.
  A very sad reality check…

Anyways, we began to walk along the narrow path of the favela. The sidewalk wass covered with thick bundles of low hanging, rigged electricity wires; the houses looked outrageously unstable as they teetered on makeshift stilts and were plastered together with uneven, and clearly homemade, concrete jobs. The piercing sound of 6 or 7 babies screaming was so constant I didn’t even notice it by the time we reached the bottom 2 1/2 hours later. The smells changed every two steps. First, it was baked goods from a random 20ft squared bakery that sat along the side of the path. Then, it was the overwhelming reek of urine. Then it was the smell of garbage, which filled the lower areas, sometimes a couple feet deep, with trash. The sewage and the water systems were mediocre at best, but mostly, all the sewage runs through the streets to the bottom: thus why the lower homes are so much more affordable!

The path wound up and down, with mud, garbage, and cracked concrete for what seemed like kilometers. Hundreds, if not thousands of paths led off from the “main route” that we walked. Some paths led to homes directly, others were stairs that continued into deeper crevices of the favela.  The place was amaze: nothing was in order, nothing was labeled.  It would literally take the knowledge of someone who lived and breathed the favela from birth to understand the complex routes of Rocinha.  Yet, almost surprisingly, the people were friendly. Obviously they knew our guide very well, and we were there during the middle of the day, but everyone was just as curious as we were! The kids were happy that random gringos wanted to see their homes. The women making beads to sell on the beach loved to banter and flirt with the white men on the tour, and the bakers on our path were happy to sell us their fresh goods and make a few dollars.

Obviously, I would not recommend exploring a favela alone based on how nice the people we met were. Without a guide, and during the night, a favela would be a very dangerous place. Drug dealers, the very poor, and the people who live day to day in a corrupted community, are the reasons favelas and police are so closely linked. Rio’s police force has been diligently working to clear out drugs and weapons from each of the favelas, one at a time. But having a full-fledged weapons war is a sketchy operation in a tight knit society where only the residents know the roads, and where weapons are around every corner. However, for the upcoming Olympics and World Cup, Rio is trying to clean up its act. The police announce on television, a week before a raid, exactly where and when they will be entering a favela. That gives time for the drug dealers to leave, and avoid any conflicts. Whether this tactic works is hard to judge, but propaganda says it has been beneficial thus far. Either way, it looks like favelas are in for the long haul in Brazil. Their way of life is so integrated into society, it would be close to impossible to change their ways.

Rio De Janeiro

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Rio is, for lack of a better word, dramatic. The city is defined by its sweeping expanses of white sand beaches, looming mountains, colourful neighborhoods and crowded favelas. It is 1/3 the size of Sao Paulo, with a measly 7 million people, yet easily has 3 times the character.
  We stayed in the Copacabana district of Rio, just a short couple blocks from one of the most famous beaches on Earth. The neighborhood is crowded with Barzinos, cheap juice bars and a boardwalk lined with street venders and thrifty places to enjoy caipirinhas!

On our first evening, we decided to enjoy the boardwalk nightlife. We walked a good stretch of the Copacabana surf before stopping in at a lively bar full of people playing drums and dancing on the sidewalk. We ordered a caipirinha each and a coconut (which was incredibly refreshing) and watched the locals dance through the night. 
Dancing appears to be a huge part of Brazilian culture. People have no problem stopping in the middle of their walk to drop some sweet dance moves for 5 minutes and then continue on their way. No dance floor needed; couples and or singles will dance in the sidewalk, next to their tables, out in the sand, or wherever they feel! But why not when every person in the country could kick ass in a “So You Think You Can Dance Canada” episode. I guess we’ll see how Adam and I fair in a dance off as Carnaval countdown begins!

The next morning, we had a full day of touring. With only three days to see the city, we felt the need to pack our days full. We booked a city tour through the hostel and ended up getting an amazing private tour of Rio from our guide Andre. The three of us hopped in a taxi and spent the morning hitting the sites! 
We started off at the Sambodrome, the giant Carnaval parade route where people sit in the stands and watch the samba schools go by. The stands have several levels of VIP. The lowest ticket prices are around 80-100 Reais per day, and the more affluent box seats will sell for up to 100 000 Reais ($70 000ish) per evening! We visited the Sambodrome 3 days before Carnaval started, and crews were working round the clock to set up the area.

After the Sambodrome, we went to the big futbol stadium. The Maracana futbol stadium used to be the largest stadium in the world, holding up to 200 000 fans in its bleachers. Right now, the stadium is closed for repairs as crews renovate the stadium for both the 2014 world cup, and the 2016 summer Olympics. Construction crews are keeping the shape and structure of the stadium, but changing the capacity a much more manageable 55 000: all with proper seats (unlike my earlier description of the Boca stadium in Buenos Aires). Although we were unable to actually go IN to the Maracana stadium, the layout is so open, that you are able to see into the center from the road, having mainly large gates and no walls as the outside structure.

After the stadium, we quickly stopped by the centro of Rio to see the city’s largest church. It is a huge conical shape right in the heart of the business district and seems very out of place. The building is quite unique, with massive stained glass motifs stretching towards the ceiling. The church holds a total of 20 000 people, making it by far the largest (I think in the country). We just happened to arrive during Sunday mass, which was very neat; however, even though Brazil has the largest catholic population in the world, the place was not close to being full.

From the church we drove over to the Lapa district to see the Santa Teresa steps. This was definitely one of the highlights of the day. At the top of a couple hundred steps, there is a convent where women spend their entire lives cloistered, making shoes for the poor and praying all day long. The story goes, that you could hear the women, through the window, praying for the souls of the less fortunate. So, in order to bring some cheer to the neighborhood, and to the women who spent their lives dedicated to prayer, an artist decided to tile the steps and 
make them beautiful. He collected tiles from all over the world, and in one amazing mosaic collection, he created the now famous Santa Theresa steps. The artist still works there during the week, constantly adding to the collection. We walked the steps and found tiles from every country imaginable. Our guide told us that people now send him unique tiles from their home so they can be included. The mosaic really is breathtaking, and there was even a couple that was having their wedding photos taken on the steps when we arrived!

Once we took about a thousand photos of the steps, we made our ascent up to the Christ the Redeemer statue. I have seen this statue in countless numbers of films and TV shows and have ALWAYS wanted to see it for myself. It’s such a beautiful idea to have a statue, of which you can see almost anywhere in the city, as a welcome, literally with open arms, to the immigrants and visitors of Brazil. The statue is 28m from hand to hand and 38m from top to bottom. It is one of the wonders of the world, and, once again, another bucket list checked off!  
We had to drive up most of the mountain, take a bus from there, then an elevator, and finally, climb stairs to reach the top… But the resulting view was spectacular! With a completely unmarred, 360-degree view of Rio, the mountain is PERFECT for photographing the city. The beaches, the mountains, the centro, all the things we had just explored in the city were there. However, viewpoints are viewpoints, and even after taking a shot of the beautiful Copacabana or Sugar Loaf Mountain, when you turn around and are faced with this unreal, larger than life statue, it is… Unexplainable. It is awful, in the sense of the word that it “fills one with awe”. It is moving and exciting and I couldn’t get over the fact I was standing right under it and looking up. After seeing so many world wonders in the past few years, you would expect them to be less wonderful. But I’m amazed, every time, how incredible and unique each one is. Once again, I recommend Rio’s Christ the Redeemer!

After this, our tour ended. We were forced to postpone our tour of Sugar Loaf Mountain for a couple days due to Carnaval rehearsals, and so, we were dropped off at the hostel early. This didn’t phase us in the slightest, as we grabbed some beers and checked out the beach for some afternoon rays! (Or at least Adam did, since I am still required to sit in the shade).  
After dinner we explored the beach nightlife again, this time waking in the other direction, and enjoying the music of a solo guitarist playing at one of the local restaurants. We had planned on going out on the town to a funk party, but after dressing up, found we didn’t have the energy to party until sunrise, only to be at our favela tour for 9am the next morning.

 

Ilhabela Part 2 – Anna Arrives

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We were quietly reading at the end of the dock (I was in the shade of course) when Anna spotted us; “Hilaryyyyyyyyyyyyyy!” she yelled as she, Stefano and Julia came towards us. Hugs and intros were made, then immediately to business! A round of strawberry/lime caipirinhas were ordered and a giant fish dinner was going to be prepared! (side note: strawberry/lime is my new favourite).  We all went for a swim, sipped on drinks, caught up on stories and celebrated our reunion in Brazil!! A fantastic afternoon if I say so myself.

Before dinner was up, Anna invited us to come check out the new home her family was building. Although her grandparents already own a large home on the hillside, this new place is where they’ve always envisioned their dream home; and oh my god a dream home it is! This is a place for family and friends to gather, just minutes up the hill from the hotel, and it has a breathtaking view of the ocean and island. Although still in construction, they are hoping for the house to be livable by Carnaval (less than a week away). But even unfinished, you can see how perfect this place is going to be.  There’s a beautiful wood entrance with a walkway over a fishpond to start.  You can see right through the house to the view from the other side. Giant peaked ceilings make up the common room that is big enough for a great party! It will be fully equipped with a billiards table and an area for people to congregate. Then there’s the state-of-the-art kitchen, the giant bar with a beautifully tiled floor, and the lavish infinity pool that looks out over the edge of the mountain towards the sea. The pool had just been filled that afternoon so we took advantage and were the first people to swim in it! It was incredible!

Then, every family member has his or her own bedroom, each with an en-suite bathroom and a gorgeous wooden porch with a view! As well, there are several equally equipped guest rooms, one of which is 100% wheelchair accessible just in case (Foresight from Anna’s sister who is a geriatrics doctor). Even the maid’s quarters were spectacular with a quaint little “American” kitchen and lovely bedroom. Her parents have the best room (obviously), which is on the top floor and overlooks the pool. They have a private hot tub area as well as a bathroom that shames the one we have in our hotel suite! Their walk-in closet is about the same size as my bedroom at home, and the peaked ceilings with wooden beams gives the place a modern looking log cabin feel – with the most unreal view of a tropical island. All in all, the place has 12 bathrooms and, to be honest, I lost track of the number of rooms. But I would KILL for a house like this! As her father puts it, “it’s Anna’s mother’s dream house and his nightmare house” as I’m sure the cost of the place is out of this world – but worth every penny.  Congrats Anna on the wonderful place, I promise I will be back to visit when it’s all completed!!

After checking out the house, we got a call that dinner was ready down at the hotel bar. A wonderful meal of fish and rice and salad, the 6 of us (Anna, Stefano, Julia, Anna’s mother, and Adam and I) sat in the bar, stuffed our faces and told stories as the sun went down over the water. We stayed well into the night drinking beers and cosmopolitans and, we had so much fun that Adam and I were easily convinced to stay another night. Rio can wait one more day for us!

So the next day, we got up early and headed out to the dock to go boating. Anna and Stefano already had everything organized for the trip; the boat was filled with gas, the cooler was filled with drinks and the wake boards were loaded up!
  The 5 of us jumped on, and headed on our way. We were off to the opposite side of the island (about an hour and a half speedboat ride away), which is, essentially, a deserted expanse of white sand beaches and bright green water. Apart from the occasional tiny home for fishermen, and a restaurant managed by the owner of the Ilhabela yacht club, the place is empty. It is only accessible by boat, or by a couple hours of extreme 4X4ing through dense jungle – which is what makes it such an idyllic paradise.

So we sped through the water towards our destination, blasted some tunes and enjoyed the sunshine. The trip was gorgeous. Dozens of small, uninhabited islands were scattered around the inlet. Thick, leafy jungle sprawled across the landscape, and misty clouds hung around the peaks of the hills. Large birds circled overhead, and once again I felt like I was an extra in a Jurassic Park movie.

When we arrived on the other side of the island, we pulled up to the restaurant and Anna asked the two men working there to make us some lunch. They had already heard we were coming and were preparing a big feast for us all!  Apparently this restaurant serves the BEST and freshest fish in the whole of the Ilhabela, so we were excited to try it out. As we waited for lunch, we opened up a few bottles of champagne to celebrate and went for a swim. Within no time, a man in a dingy came out to our boat to bring us ashore for food. The place smelled delicious! There was rice, beans and salad, with my new favourite palmito on it, then roasted potatoes with rosemary and a huge fillet of fresh fish for us all. The guys brought out cervejas and we ate until we could hardly move (or I did at least).

After lunch, it was time to wakeboard! Anna and Stefano were clearly pros and showed off all their tricks. Adam was a rockstar, obviously, and figured it out first try.  Showoff.  He even had an amazing moment where he jumped a wave, got some pretty good air and then, with all limbs in different directions, crashed into the ocean sideways. Haha! I, on the other hand, am about as good at wake boarding as I am at charades! On the first try alone I sliced a finger on my left hand open and bruised three other knuckles. Great start!  By the third try, I almost had it! Then the fourth try I smashed my right hand, thought my left middle finger was broken and had to go back to the boat to ice it. (Even 4 days later I have a good chunk missing from my left hand, my middle finger is twice as wide as the others, and every muscle in my back feels whip lashed).  Not that I’m complaining! I had a wonderful time taking photos and one day I will defeat the waves!

After we all had our turns we headed back to the Hotel Mercedes exhausted. Up to the room for naps and quiet time before dinner. Sadly, this was our last evening on the island. This was by far the longest stop we’ve had in one place, and it was wonderful!

 

Stefano, Me, Adam, Anna, Julia

If anyone would like to see more photos of the hotel we were at, you can check out the website at www.hotelmercedes.com.br (under accommodations you can click “suite VIP” for pictures of our room).

 

Ilhabela Part 1: Paradise and Hemorrhoid Cream

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View from our balcony

I knew it was going to be a good day when I woke up Monday morning, after a great night’s sleep, and had an amazing cup of coffee! We were off to the Ilhabela to stay at my friend Anna’s hotel for a few days. Anna has been unconditionally helpful to us on the trip so far. She has booked us flights, phoned hostels, and put up with my endless emails asking her to translate Portuguese so I can organize Carnaval accommodation. On top of all that, she is the manager of an amazing 4 star hotel, called Hotel Mercedes, on an island off the coast of Brazil, and has reserved us a room for the week!
 

 

The morning continued successfully when we arrived with perfect timing to the bus station.  We got our tickets for a cheaper price than expected, and I finally found a dress that I had long been searching for (at 50% off, might I add). It took us about 4 hours to get to the island, including the quick 15 minute ferry from Sao Sebastio. We easily found a cab that took us right to the hotel, and was greeted by a bellboy who grabbed both our bags to take to reception.

 

We already realized we were outside our comfort zone. There’s no way we are classy enough for a place like this. It is absolutely unbelievable. As I told Anna, I could have slept on one of the couches in the lobby and been on cloud nine! 
Adam and I decided the place was medieval castle meets Caribbean luxury resort! A unique combination of stone walls and large, dark wood furniture combined with modern looking white and blue accent pieces and splashes of bright tropical color. The place has it’s own private beach and bar with a swimming pool, a long dock with a plethora of sun chairs and a refreshing breeze! We checked into the hotel, and the bellboy brought us, and our bags, through the hotel to our room. It is quite a walk through the place; we passed a large common room with a huge 52″ TV in it, a reading room with tables and chairs to relax in, and walked over a small river with waterfalls that runs right through the middle of the grounds. We were escorted up to a floor that needed a special key just to get on to, walked to the end of the hall, and was led in to our suite… OH MY GOD!

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This is hands down the nicest place I’ve ever stayed in. We had the most VIP suite in the entire hotel. Our bathroom alone was bigger than my bedroom at home, with a his and her sink, a two person Jacuzzi, a walk-in shower that could fit 11 people (Adam at 6′ could lie down in the shower and have a good foot and a half to spare before touching the walls!). Our bedroom had a 46″ plasma TV in it, a two person couch that sat in front of a king sized bed, a fully stocked mini fridge, a lounge chair and a whole desk area full of stylish magazines. Our deck, which was on the corner of the building, looked out towards both the ocean, and across the property. We had a little glass table with chairs for a morning coffee, or a crib tournament in the evenings, and a big round lounge chair to curl up and watch the sunset (my favourite place in the room). We were absolutely floored by the place! Anna, if you’re reading this, you are an angel. You have outdone yourself, so thank you to you, Stefano and to your family sooooo much!
 

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After settling into our room, we went down to the pool for a swim. The pool was like bath water and was a perfect way to unwind, watch the sunset and nibble on a bruschetta appy! We then walked around the area checking out the neighboring beaches and the nearby restaurants (we definitely have the nicest beach area). Then afterwards, off to town for dinner! This is the first time on our trip that I actually look like a girl! With the dress I bought earlier and the fact that there is a shower with pressure AND a hairdryer in our room, I actually managed to look presentable for dinner! So we bussed into town and found a lovely restaurant with live music and a great atmosphere. We shared a large fish dish that was delicious.  This was also the first time we’ve ordered seafood on the trip, so that made me happy.  After dinner we stocked up on beers, and the mixes needed for delicious caipirinhas, and headed back to the room for another crib tournament.

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The next morning, after an amazing sleep in our air-conditioned room and king-sized bed, we went to breakfast. For breakfast we were spoiled again. It was served, buffet-style, in a giant hall and had everything under the sun: fresh fruits and pastries, rolls, croissants, cereal, frittatas, coffees, juices, various meats and cheeses and two whole tables of desserts! There was apple crumble, chocolate cake, cheese cake and so many more! This is definitely a change from the stale bun and dolce de leche we have been getting at our hostels, so we took FULL advantage of the feast! 


 

But after breakfast, you’ll be sad to hear, our day got very stressful. We went out to the dock, set up lounge chairs and umbrellas, grabbed some icy beers and homemade caipirinhas and sat there for 6 hours. Decision-making was difficult… Should I hold my beer in my left hand, and have the breeze blow cold condensation on my stomach, or in my right hand where it is more difficult to write my blogs? Should we listen to Matchbox 20 or Third Eye Blind on Adam’s speakers? It’s frustrating that the beautiful cruise ships are in the way of my otherwise uninterrupted view of the mainland mountains. It’s equally upsetting that I can’t spend the afternoon picking out shapes in the clouds… because there aren’t any. Should I tan my back, or my front? Read or listen to music? Swim in the ocean or the pool?  Luckily I don’t have to worry about going to the bar for beer, or keeping track of money, because the bar staff will bring everything out to us, and just charge it to the room… But that’s really the only thing we have going for us. 

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Either way, after 6 hours in the sun, even with sunscreen, I was a lobster from head to toe! We’d been drinking steadily in the sunshine for several too many hours and I needed to go inside. So back up to our suite we went! Sadly, once we got there, we missed being at the pool, so we decided, in our inebriated state, to have our own pool party! 
I honestly don’t think it is humanly possible for any other male / female duo to make this honeymoon suite LESS romantic than Adam and I did. We first filled our two-person Jacuzzi tub with icy cold water (to ease my burn) and added Adam’s laundry “camp suds” detergent to make tonnes of bubbles. Then we grabbed a family sized bag of Ruffles chips, cracked a couple more beers and belted out, old school Third Eye Blind songs (with the speakers on full blast) for the better part of 2 hours.  We then high-fived at the realization that we were probably the only people to have ever done this in such a VIP suite. Once again, clearly not classy enough for a place like this. 


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After the Jacuzzi party, we headed back into town for dinner. We went back to the same restaurant, since they had amazing deals on food before 8pm. Our two main problems for the evening were money and sunburns. We had just enough cash on us for dinner, some after-sun lotion, a case of beer and the bus home with 3 dollars to spare, and so, Adam ran to the bank during dinner to get cash. Unfortunately that particular bank would not work with either of our cards. So after dinner, we went to the only other bank in town; BOTH machines were out of order. Great.

 

Even with our limited funds, my sunburn was stinging so badly that I stopped in the pharmacy to grab some aloe. I couldn’t see any on the shelf, so tried to ask the man behind the counter. I did one of those “I don’t know your language, so I’m going to attempt to describe my issue via charades” act… The man handed me hemorrhoid cream. Clearly I’m not cut out for charades. Turns out, the cream was ALSO useful for sunburns, but no one mentioned that it will also turn your skin a streaky beige colour. At this point I would have tried anything: so I buy the lotion. Then we wait at the bus stop, I’m covered in hemorrhoid cream from head to toe, and we have a combined total of $3 to our names. The bus comes and we jump on. Turns out, this is the turn around point for this bus, and we start going in the wrong direction from our hotel. The stop buttons aren’t working, and we don’t know where we are going, so, 4km in the wrong direction, when the bus makes its first stop, we jump off. Now we have $2 to our names, we are in the middle of nowhere on a random island, and I am STILL covered in hemorrhoid cream. Luckily, within a couple minutes, a bus drives by; we chase it down and cross our fingers it’s going where we need to go. It does! We head up to the room, I take an Advil and try to sleep while Adam watches a movie in Portuguese. Rough day in paradise.
 

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The next day we decide to do nothing again. Breakfast in the morning, beach in the day! Only this time Adam won’t let me in the sun. So I am forced to stay in the shade of an umbrella and sulk while I watch everyone play in the sunshine. It is, however, another perfect day. Cool breeze, flying fish jumping out of the water on all sides of us, big turtles coasting through the waves, and a perfectly sunny afternoon! We once again sit for hours reading, lounging, and sipping on cool beverages: a much-needed vacation after a month of travel.  Honestly, traveling is tough! At the end of the day, we are much more relaxed, albeit still broke. The ATM’s were still out of service, so we decide to leave the issue for “mañana” – such a South American mindset already!
 

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When mañana arrives, we head to the big town of Ilhabela to find a working bank machine. It’s our major excursion for the day, and after three days of nothing this seems like an impossible task. But we guess the bus system correctly this time, so the trip is fairly straightforward. I even find some real aloe vera at the supermarket! Then back to the beach (where I’m again banned from the sun) to await Anna’s arrival!

Sao Paulo: Barzinos and Caipirinhas!

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The short three days we spent in Sao Paulo were amazing, thanks to the generosity of my wonderful friends, Lilian and Raf. We spent Friday in zombie mode after our sleepless bus ride from Blumenau. By the afternoon, we got our bearings in the Vila Mariana and checked out a local mall for a couple hours. Sao Paulo is MASSIVE, and that is a huge understatement. It is the business district of Brazil and has a population of 20 million people (three times the size of Rio). The city buildings stretch literally as far as the eye can see, and traffic is horrendous 24/7. The metro system is, fortunately, very excellent. 2nd in the world to Shanghai, Sao Paulo’s metro moves 6 million people each day through it’s various line (As Adam pointed out, that is the equivalent of Canada’s entire population in less than a week). Commuting to work in the city sounds like a nightmare. People have up to 2 or 3 hours of commuting EACH WAY to get to their jobs (i.e. Lilian), and even a very short distance makes for a tedious journey (Raf takes a quick 40 minutes to get to work… And lives 7km away).  It’s work, work, work for most Brazilians from Monday to Friday: then the parties start!

Lilian picked us up Friday night and took us out on the town. We headed to the lively Vila Madalena neighborhood where the streets are lined with Barzinos, or “little pubs,” that are EVERYWHERE in Brazil. We found a nice one that had a live Samba band and sat down for a drink and some food. Everyone but Adam and I knew the lyrics to each and every song.  People of all ages would get up by their tables to dance and sing along! Lilian even taught us a few moves and we danced along with the locals! We sipped on icy beers and I had a kiwi caipirinha, thanks to Panos’ recommendation, that was out of this world!  It was great to see the lively atmosphere of Sao Paulo on a Friday night! Everyone clearly loves to party here and the weekend is definitely the time to let loose. Bars here close well into the morning, but we went home at a very early 2AM, because we had still been awake since the morning we woke in Blumenau.

The next day, after another terrible sleep for both of us, we went to explore the city. We walked down Franca Pinto Street and found a large farmers market that was full of fresh fruits, vegetables, cheeses, meats and fish that continued for blocks! At the end of the market was one of Sao Paulo’s largest parks. The place was filled with families, couples, people running, biking, rollerblading and picnicking all over the place! There were a number of museums – one of which we explored that was a very strange modern art museum full of creepy statues and paintings all displayed on metal scaffolds. Giant video screens hung in each one of the scaffolds and had a film of each of the artists talking, I’m assuming about their collection, but we didn’t understand any of the language so we were very lost.

After the park, we headed out on the metro to a place where they were offering free walking tours of the city. We were only 2 of 4 people that spoke English on the tour, and so the whole thing was done in Portuguese (although the guide was nice enough to come up after and give us a very brief summary about what she was talking about). Either way, we had a nice time exploring the Luz district, saw the Parque do Luz, and walked through another Brazilian museum for a half hour.

Later that evening we met up with my friend Raf and went for pizza. Not just any pizza, mind you, but the best pizza IN THE WORLD. They say that Sao Paulo makes the best pizza on Earth, so much so that Italians come here and get jealous. We went to one of the most renowned and oldest pizza parlors in all of Sao Paulo. The place was a brothel turned pizza joint, but you would never know it. By the time we arrived, the place was full and Raf already had our names on the list. The place was SUPER classy and all of a sudden I felt a little under dressed in my backpacker outfits! Thankfully, they let us in anyways. Raf did all the ordering, as we were once again lost with the Portuguese menu, and the place looked a little too nice for me to whip out our Portuguese/English dictionary that I have embarrassingly done on so many previous occasions. We started with Antarctica beer and the most amazing Bruchetta! Then came our first pizza! The thing about Brazilian pizza is that it has a thin but perfectly crispy crust to it and it’s extra cheesy!! Unfortunately, there’s no way for me to really describe what’s so awesome about it… You’ll just have to come down yourself. But I promise you; it is out of this world! We also tried one with a vegetable called palmito on it. At first I heard there was no English translation for this word.  I didn’t think I had seen it before, until finally I saw a street vendor selling it whole.  “Palmitos” are Palm Hearts! They are white and crunchy and a PERFECT addition to pizza! All future South American pizzas will be sure to have this on it!  We enjoyed our pizza dinner so much that we actually refuse to eat pizza for a while so as not to be disappointed!

After dinner, Raf took us on a whirlwind nightlife tour of Sao Paulo. We drove down Augusta street, which is Sao Paulo’s equivalent of Vancouver’s Granville street, but on steroids! People from all walks of life were out and about on a Saturday night! People were lined up for concerts, nightclubs, drinking beer in the street, gathered in groups, relaxing in Barzinos! There were the classy groups, punks, skater kids, the club crews, people listening to electro music, and others to traditional Samba. This place was the happening area of town for sure! Raf said that nightclubs could be up to $CAD30+ for cover, and they stay open until 7am. We drove down the street for about 15 to 20 minutes and didn’t get remotely close to the end. The street continues for block after block and goes straight down to the centro of Sao Paulo. We decided to head to a quieter neighborhood to catch up over some good beers. Raf took us to a pub in the Vila Mariana district that served hundreds of types of beer imported from around the world (a rare find in Brazil, where they usually offer the same 3 or 4 types of lagers). There we tried a delicious beverage that I cannot, for the life of me, remember the name of.

After the pub, Raf invited us back to his apartment for some real Brazilian booze. His apartment is right in the middle of Sao Paulo and is GEORGEOUS! An elevator that takes him directly to his front door, the apartment is the entire 15th floor and wraps around in a giant circular shape. His balcony is massive and looks out onto the endless concrete buildings that make Sao Paulo. The city is beautiful at night! The three of us sat outside, sharing stories and taking shots of cachaca well into the night. Raf offered to take us to a football match the next day, but we already have plans with Lilian’s family. Oh how I wish we had longer to spend in Sao Paulo!

For weeks now, we have been at a loss for what to do on Sundays. Sunday’s in South America are “taken very seriously” as many have told us. The cities shut down; everyone leaves the bustle of urban life, and spends the day eating good food with their families. As a backpacker, this is slightly depressing. We are left with nothing to do, and missing our families back home. This past Sunday, however, Lilian kindly invited Adam and I to join her and her family, at their country home, for a swim in the pool, a “churrasco” BBQ, and a first-hand look into how Brazilians spend their Sunday. 
So we got up bright and early Sunday morning and headed out of the city center to Lilian’s family’s place. Her family is ADORABLE! We met one of her sisters, her parents and her grandmother at the house and they immediately offered us anything we could want: breakfast, drinks, seats etc. Her parents don’t speak any English (apart from her father who throws out the occasional English word to impress us) but Lilian is a fantastic translator, and I found out later her father understands Spanish, so we are able to small talk when Lilian is gone. 
We drove the hour and a half or so out of the city to their home, and it was perfect! On a hilltop with a beautiful view of rolling hills, their house is a quaint little villa with a couple large BBQ pits and an outdoor pool. Hammocks were hung on the front porch for siesta time, lawn chairs on the grass, and 4 different puppies happily greeted us as we came through the gate! The backyard had a big vegetable garden with lettuce, fields of corn, lychee trees, mango groves, and fruits we’ve never even heard of before!

We hadn’t been at the house for more than five minutes before we were handed icy beers, a caipirinha, and the BBQ was turned on. We met Lilian’s aunt at the house as well, who brought more delicious food to the gathering. Within no time, Lilian’s father was bringing platters of meat to the table. Juicy sliced steaks and chicken wings cooked to perfection. When we moved inside, another plate was placed in front of us.  When it looked like our plate was getting low, another one appeared, overflowing with food (The same rule applied for cold beers). By the time salad and rice was brought out we were stuffed!

The caipirinhas were fantastic! We asked Lilians father to show us how to properly make them so we could try on our own later. His special formula was one thinly sliced lime, muddled at the bottom of a glass, half a lime squeezed for juice, a couple heaps of sugar, fill the glass with cachaca (39% alc) but leave a little room to water it down… with VODKA. Apparently this makes the drink smoother. No wonder we were feeling the booze after only one drink each! It probably had 5 shots of straight alcohol in it! But man were they tasty!  After lunch everyone had a siesta while Adam and I played in the pool. We had a big inter-tube that left us more entertained than a child with an oversized box. After a couple hours in the pool we sat down to a game of cards. We taught Lilian and her dad how to play golf, and even with the language barrier we had a blast!

At the end of the afternoon, Lilian’s parents headed out on their motorcycle for home, we joined them shortly afterwards in Lilian’s car. The day was absolutely wonderful and Lilian’s family was more than hospitable to us! They said next time we come to Sao Paulo we will have to stay at their home, and we can visit their beach home on the next trip (how luxurious are these people!?). It was so great to finally get to experience a Brazilian Sunday.  The tradition of family and food first is something I wish we had more of in Canada. It was definitely a perfect way to spend our last night in Sao Paulo!

Blumenau: A 46 Hour Mission for Great Beer!

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For those of you interested in hearing about our time in Curitiba, I’m sorry, we missed it. Our long bus ride from Campo Grande, apart from being 10 hours longer than our ticket said, was an additional hour and a half late. We rolled into the city close to half past 7 in the evening, and seeing the size of the city, had no desire to search out a place to stay, only to jump on a bus bright and early in the morning to head to Blumenau, our intended destination. So we arrived in Curitiba, went to the ticket counter and booked a bus right to Blumenau 45 minutes later. Another 4 hours on a bus to go. 
We heard about Blumenau, only a week and a half ago, and instantly decided we wanted to go. We have been enjoying Skol, Brahma, and Antarctica, Brazil’s mainstream beers, because they are light, refreshing and perfect to sip on at the beach or patio on a scorching day; however, we still craved a better tasting and more full flavored beer.  Due to the overwhelming number of immigrants from Germany, Blumenau has a very traditional European feel to it. It also has several German breweries, all of which produce the best beers in all of Brazil (arguably South America). “The Best Beer” is way too tempting of an idea for Adam and I, and so, we went on the most epic, 46 hour adventure in the wrong direction, to spent only 7 hours drinking… Ridiculous? Yes. Worth it? Absolutely!


 

 We pulled up at the Blumenau bus station at 12:30am, after 36 hours of traveling, with absolutely no plans. There is no information on Blumenau in our Lonely Planet guide, the bus station has no tourist desk, and everything else was closed. We were both exhausted. Although my iPod battery is in its last 10% of life, I manage to steal some wifi from somewhere in the terminal. Lucky!  We check out the hostel world app and there is only one hostel listed. Adam gets only the address written down before the wifi cuts out and we lose it completely. We don’t know the name of the hostel, where in the city it is, how much it costs, nothing: just an address. So we find a cab, point to the address, because, even after two weeks, I only know “thank you” and “goodbye” in Portuguese, and people are understanding less and less of my Spanish the further from Argentina we get. The cab drives all across town and ends up pulling into some small alleyway with no lights and no people. We drive up the road for a bit, our driver clearly looks confused, and then he pulls up to a random house that says 271.  He speaks no English or Spanish, and us no Portuguese. We have no other address or name, so our only option is to get out and knock. Adam rings the buzzer and a man comes down, clearly half asleep, and in his boxers – it is 1am. “Room?” we ask. He looks at us blankly and confused as his wife walks up behind him. Then all of a sudden, he wakes up and opens his eyes really wide “ROOM! Yes, yes! Un momento!” He puts some pants on, unlocks the door and rushes us into the house. He speaks a little English, and a lot better Spanish, which is a relief. With our Spanglish conversation, we book ourselves two beds for a decent price in a room to ourselves. He and his wife are so sweet and give us a broken old fan, and some fresh sheets. I think we are the only people staying in the place, and they seem happy about the business. We go straight to bed and sleep for 9 hours. I don’t even realize that the mattress feels like a rock and the pillow is lumpy. The fan feels great and the fact that I’m not sleeping on a bus makes me feel like I’m in a 5 star resort!

The next morning we head to the bus station, and drop our bags; we book a night bus to Sao Paulo and head to the brewery! Eisenbahn is a brewery just outside of town. It brews 10 types of beer that you can also buy around town in bottles, and is the most famous brewery in Blumenau – having won several awards! We get there at 2pm and the place is closed until 4. We are a little crushed after such a long excursion, but we cheer up when we find a local pub a block down the street. The clientele reminds me of the Squarerigger pub on a Thursday afternoon. A bunch of old men, all regulars, who are more than happy to drink beer all day and chat up anyone that is not a regular in the bar. No one speaks English, but one old man comes up to us to have a conversation anyways. He speaks Portuguese, I explain I only know Spanish, he thinks we are German and spits out a few words to us in German. We managed to get across that we we’re Canadian here on vacation to drink the best beers in Brazil. He laughs, and luckily speaks some Spanish, and then explains the history of Blumenau to me.  He describes about the immigrants coming from Germany, but I only pick up half of what he’s saying. I nod and smile nonetheless and ask some questions I think are relevant to the conversation. (Yes Caitlin, old men telling me life stories even happens to me in Brazil- nothing has changed since Ireland, except instead of not understanding accents, I don’t even understand the language!). As Adam points out afterwards, this is my first Portuguese conversation! We high-five about this, even though I didn’t speak one word of Portuguese. We order another Skol, the cheapest we’ve found in Brazil yet, and pre-drink for the brewery!

By 4:00 we are already tipsy, so we stumble over to the brewery. There are so many options of beer, so we start at the top of the list and work our way down! There’s Pilsen, Kolsch, Pale Ale, Weizenbier, Dunkel, Raucherbier: you name it, they’ve got it! As well, they perfectly pair each item on the food list to its proper beer. We shared a schnitzel dish with mustard and tried nearly every beer on the menu throughout the afternoon. There was even champagne they made there called Lust! I got very excited, but it was R99 for a small bottle ($60) so we took a photo instead! Much more economical 🙂

After the brewery we went downtown to walk the main streets. It was like walking through a traditional little German village! The architecture was unlike anything else we’ve come across in Brazil, but the atmosphere was still lively! You can definitely see how this city holds the second largest Oktoberfest party in the world! We stopped at another pub right in the middle of town and had dinner on the patio (with more delicious beer of course). And afterwards we headed to the bus.

I’m not exactly sure what we were thinking when we decided to take a 10 hour night bus drunk, but I can tell you I won’t be doing it again. We figured we would just pass out right away and the beer would help us forget the noise and movement. This might have happened, until we decided to search out the cheapest bus that Brazil has to offer. The seats went back about 2 and a half inches, there was no leg support, the bus lurched over the cobblestone roads and potholed highways and I slept for probably about 15 minutes total the whole night. Not to mention, everyone was already in “sleep mode” when we hopped on the bus, while we were in “party mode”. So we spent the better part of 2 hours telling stories and giggling on the bus in the dark trying not to disturb the sleepers before we decided to try to get some shuteye. All in all, we spent 46 hours getting to and from Blumenau, and spent 20 hours actually in the city (9 of which were spent sleeping). I dare anyone to come up with a larger mission to find good beer! Our bus to Sao Paulo was on time, and we arrived in the station at 7:15 am on zero sleep. We found our way through the metro system and arrived at our hostel 4hours and 15 minutes before check in. Fantastic…

The Pantanal – Tropical Wetlands of Brazil

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So Adam’s upbeat attitude paid off and we made it to the Pantanal as planned. We arrived 3 hours late and a man was there to greet us as planned: he only had to stand there for a few hours!
  Our tour group had apparently already left for the jungle, but the guy who greeted us said “no problem” he would just drive us the 5 hours into the middle of nowhere himself, then drive back to Campo Grande alone (yes, he is that nice). He said it would be no problem, because if we left right away he would be back in time to have a nap, and then head out to the clubs with one of his 7 girlfriends. Excuse me?

 

So pretty much immediately after getting off 18 hours of busses, we hop into his beat-up Fiat van and drive through the wetlands towards nowhere. We make excellent time because there is no traffic on the road, stop for lunch and make it to our checkpoint a good hour before schedule. From there we were herded into the back of a pickup truck (exactly like the death cab in Kao Sok for those of you in Thailand with us) and continue for another hour, off-roading through the jungle, towards camp.

The camp is very well put together, and much more luxurious than I would have imagined. There are tons of hammock circles covered by thatched grass roofs, a little swimming pool, beach volley ball court, a small bar, a big dining area, bungalows with dorm style beds and even a soccer field (which is totally unusable because it is filled with cows and bulls). There are a tonne of noisy parrots and unique looking birds (we even saw a great horned owl a few minutes ago). Weird looking little pigs keep roaming around our hammocks and the bugs, of course, are endless.

On our first night, after a wonderful buffet dinner, we went on a “night safari”.   We all jumped into the back of a large truck, our guide Paulo held a huge spotlight, and we drove through the jungle in search of animals!  Before we even left the camp a giant bug hit one of the girls in the chest and fell onto her lap. She started screaming and jumping around, so everyone’s flashlights quickly moved to see what was happening. There on the ground was the absolute LARGEST beetle I have ever seen in my LIFE.  The thing was a little larger than the palm of my hand, with giant pincers and thick, pointed legs! It scuttled around on the ground, freaking even the boys out, until the guide picked it up and tossed it off the side. I’m pretty sure that made everyone a little itchy and squeamish for the next hour of our excursion. Adam and I faired the best, but even the Israeli boys were a little jumpy as every few seconds another beetle hit one of us in the face or leg.
  The jungle was full of life we couldn’t see at night. Frogs, bugs, birds and what sounded like a loud dying cat filled the air with a deafening noise that almost drowned out the sound of the truck we were in! We managed to see quite a bit of wildlife in the short hour we were out. Apart from the bugs, obviously, we saw a whole load of caimans in the ponds. Their glowing eyes were actually really freaky, a good dozen of them staring back at us into the light. Next we came across a family of capybaras, the largest rodents on earth.  They are just like gophers, but are larger than most big dogs. Very weird. Then we saw a Toco toucan in one of the trees, which was really exciting. We saw a bunch of them in the bird sanctuary in Foz Do Iguassu but it was really fun to see one in the wild. We also ran across a deer (yes they are even in the Amazon!) and a fox!

 

The next morning we had breakfast bright and early at 7am. We then went horseback riding all morning! The horses were younger and had a lot more energy than the ones in Uruguay, so we had plenty of chances to gallop along the open meadows, and canter into lakes deep enough to get our feet soaked. The horses seemed particularly thrilled to run into the lakes and splash around for a while. We didn’t see a lot of wildlife, but the ride was amazing and we were out for a couple hours, messing around through the jungle.

After a short siesta and a wonderful lunch, we set out, in the back of the pickup once again, and towards the Parana River for a boat ride through the wetlands. We didn’t see as much unique wildlife as I had expected. Families of capybaras were fun to photograph, and the occasional caiman, but we did see ENDLESS species of birds. So many I can’t remember even a quarter of their names.  However, even though we didn’t spot the elusive jaguar, or catch an anteater, the scenery was beautiful, and the sunset on the way home was spectacular!

The next morning we were up bright and early for a 3-hour jungle trek. Honesty, I should have stayed in bed. I got very little sleep because Adam and I stayed up late drinking beers with the most interesting man in the world, and so, I was already not looking forward to a three-hour excursion. I also was NOT prepared for the number of mosquitoes that would be out at that time of day!  In the end, we didn’t see any wildlife because three of the guys we were with were so noisy. So instead of a wilderness trek, we hiked it through the dense jungle (at parts literally fighting through with a machete) and I was DESTROYED by mosquito bites. For all of you present for the bug bites Caitlin and I had in Thailand… This was worse. Fortunately, we made it home, and I cheered up a bit after a nice shower and a hearty lunch!

For our afternoon activity, we went piranha fishing! This was by far my favourite part of the Pantanal. We trucked out to one of the near by rivers with some bamboo rods and set up camp with a bucket full of raw steak! 
The piranhas at this time of year (end of the dry season) are starving, so it’s very easy to get a nibble. It is more difficult to pull one out, since they are very smart, and very quick! We were told to stand right up close to the river’s edge, which was slightly unnerving for a couple of reasons. Firstly, one of the guides apparently went into the river a couple years earlier and had a cut on her leg. The piranhas instantly started attacking her leg and she was lucky to get out before losing it. We were apparently fine, because they only attack open wounds, but I didn’t particularly want to push my luck.  Secondly, there were several caimans just a few feet in front of us that smelled the meat and wanted some food. Apparently, the caimans wont attack us, but this was told to us by our guide Paulo, who was making the caimans snap away at dead piranhas he held above their heads… and Paulo was missing a finger. So I’m not sure if he is the most trustworthy source.

Nonetheless, I stepped up to the water, Marcello baited my hook, threw it in and said “when u feel a nibble, pull straight up very quickly”. Before he even finished his sentence I said, “like this?” and jerked the rod straight into the air. The hook, with the meat still attached flew about 12 feet into the air, and a piranha, NOT attached to the hook flew right along side it. I’m pretty sure I must have shrieked a little as both of them flew towards me at a considerable speed. I let the hook swing past me, and the piranha landed at my feet. Everyone looked a little stunned. My memories of fishing in the past have been a lot of waiting around, and not a lot of nibbles, but this was VERY different. Turns out the piranha I caught was a baby, so Marcello kicked it back in (with flip flops on) and we tried again. All of us caught several fish in the short time we were there. I only caught the baby ones (and a tree at one point), and Marcello joked I was the worst fisherman he’d ever seen! Adam turned out to be the hero of the day and snagged two big ones to take home and grill up!

Ultimately, fishing was my favourite part of the Pantanal. If you ever get the opportunity to fish for piranhas DEFINITELY do it. It’s a little difficult to try to fish, while watching for flying hooks, trying to avoid the wasps that want the meat, and keeping an eye out for the caimans that will sneak up within a meter before grunting and giving away their position (and scaring the hell out of the fisherman) but it’s totally worthwhile. As Antoine, one of the French guys, put it “there are too many dangerous things all around!”  
At the end of the afternoon, Marcello and Paulo cleaned the fish, and we headed back to the pousada. For dinner that night, on top of the buffet, we were presented with a huge platter of BBQ piranhas! We each took one and they were pretty delicious! It’s a tasty white meat, but very bony. Kind of reminded me of crab, because it was difficult to get into, but worth the fight! Most of the meat was in the head, which freaked out Antoine and Francois when we ate the eyes and brains.  When in Rome, right?

Our final morning we went trekking through the forest again. I was unenthused to be eaten alive by mosquitoes again, but our guides ensured us we’d see more animals because the noisy Israeli boys had left.  So we dragged ourselves into the truck and drove out to a new trekking area. I came prepared with my bottle of mosquito repellant in hand, the longest pants I own, a long sleeved shirt, AND Adam’s long sleeved shirt on top of that (because he is impermeable to mosquitoes. Jerk.). It was so unbearably hot in the sunshine I could hardly handle it, but I then remembered how itchy I was and powered through. We did see more animals this time, including monkeys, coatis and hyacinth macaws (which are endangered, and only 4000 exist in the Pantanal) among many others. Day 2’s trek was much more worth it.

That afternoon, we packed up our things and headed back to Campo Grande. We waited a few hours at the hostel and caught the 23:25 bus to Curitiba. I took a Gravol about a half hour before the scheduled bus time, because the meds take so much longer to hit me than Adam; however, when our bus left 45 min late I was a total zombie. I could hardly stand; I dragged my feet towards the bus and climbed the steps. The whole bus wreaked of urine, but I didn’t care, I snuck in beside a random man, managed to put together my elaborate sleeping arrangement (the only way I can sleep on the bus) of a sleeping mask, sweater, coat, blow up neck pillow, sarong as a blanket, footrest down, purse tied around left leg, and water by my side. Finally, I don’t have to move for hours!  
We got no more than 10 minutes into the trip before the bus stopped for gas. Everyone had to get off the bus and wait at a checkpoint. I unhappily dragged my ass off the bus and found a bench to sit on to wait. My vision was almost blurry at this point I was so exhausted. I folded in half sitting on the bench, let my head hang between my legs and was half in and out of sleep while Adam watched for the bus. The blood rushing to my brain from being upside-down didn’t help with dizziness, so thankfully the bus came back only 15 minutes later. After setting up camp again, I passed out so fast. I woke up 8 hours later at a breakfast checkpoint and was the only person on the bus. My eyes were stinging from dehydration, and I guarantee I looked like a train wreck. So I washed up in the bathrooms and felt a little more human. It was 8:40am local time (the time zones in this area of Brazil are very confusing) and according to our tickets we got off at 9:00am. This was a pleasant surprise, because we thought it would be longer. Then a man came on the bus and announced in Portuguese that we were making excellent time, and we would arrive in Curitiba at 6:00 PM tonight. Excuse me?  Looks like our ticket was wrong: only 10 hours to go.

Transportation Adventure

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Well, everyone should be happy to hear that my travel luck has moved from horrendous airport fiascos to endless bus rides.  Adam and I have been trying to get to Campo Grande for 2 days now.  We told our hostel 3 days ago that we wanted to book a bus right away. They ensured us that busses go several times a day, so to check back with them the morning we wanted to leave and they could book us a ticket.

So the next morning, our receptionist Clei calls up the station and books us on the 5 pm bus. We paid for our ticket, went out to see the bird sanctuary for the afternoon, grabbed our bus snacks (because god knows I’m not eating that bus food again) and make it back to the hostel a couple hours early. 
”Bad news” says Clei. The bus is full. Not just ours, but ALL the busses. No more leave until the following night! So, we book the next day’s bus, stay at the hostel for one more night, make it through the day at the giant Paraguayan/Brazil dam and head towards the bus station (finally).

Our bus is supposed to leave at 18:00.  We are fairly on time and leave at quarter after instead.  No big deal. The scenery in Brazil is surprisingly stunning! It reminds us a lot of driving through the Okanagan with rolling hills of green and fields of crops. Other than a little bit of construction on the highway, we are making good time. Which is really nice because we have to switch busses in a city a couple hours up the road in order to continue North. We have 2 hours on the first bus, 13 on the second. Makes for a long night. Unfortunately, just when everything seems so great, our bus gets stopped for a random drug check. Police come on board with drug dogs and search the isles. Our bags are all taken off the bus, opened up and searched through. A couple people are asked to step off the bus and be checked, but in the end, nothing is found and we all continue. We are now another 25 minutes late.  
I start to wonder if we are going to have issues catching our connecting bus. Thankfully, Adam is the voice of reason and ensures me that the bus system in Brazil is probably like airplanes, and they will let the other bus know we are running behind. This satisfies me enough to stop worrying; however, when we arrive at our random town in the middle of nowhere, our bus has already left. One of the employees at the bus station checks our tickets and writes 22:00 on it. “This your new time, 22:00”. Okay, we have an hour and 15 minutes to wait. Not to worry, we will play a couple games of crib and the time will pass. At 10 minutes to, we head out to where our bags are all stored. A few others join us, but there is no bus. So we wait. At 5 minutes after, we are all asked to move BACK into the terminal to wait. No one is allowed to stand in the loading area anymore. Then they close all the exits but one, set up some ropes and a podium at the only open door, and wait. As busses start showing up around 10:30, crowds of people start huddling around the podium trying to get out. We do the same, as we see someone moving our bags (which had to be left outside) towards a bus and loading them on.  No one is allowed outside. The attendants have a GIANT list of names printed off on some old school printer paper from the 90’s (the one where all the pages are in one long row and you have to rip the holed edges off in order to get a normal sized page). The attendant then starts at the top of the list and works his was down the pages (at least 4 long it looks like) reading one name at a time for passengers on 3 different busses that are parked outside. From the absolute zero Portuguese that I understand, I realize something is not working with the system.  Everything has to be done manually, one person at a time. 
Unlike if this happened in Canada, where people would be unhappy, but quietly brood away in their heads, Brazilians are much more verbal. Everyone is yelling at the attendants: “Dios a mio” (oh my God) is heard repeatedly.  The ruckus is making all the names harder and harder to hear! We push our way to the front, and get on our bus relatively early, which is perfect, because it’s 11:00 and I want to take a Gravol to sleep with on the bus. I was worried about taking it before, incase the bus never came and we were required to function. 
So, much later, after another manual seat check on the bus, we pull out of the depot and continue our journey.  At this point, we are 5 hours and 15 min into our trip.

Total kilometers traveled: 100.

Normally this would be a non-issue. Time is time, who cares, EXCEPT, this is the only place in our trip that we actually have a tour guide waiting for us on the other side. This poor man is going to be standing with a sign that says “Adam and Hilary” and we will not be getting off the bus! We are supposed to be starting our 3-day tour, right as we get off the bus, and head deep into the Pantanal. So, since our bus didn’t wait 20 minutes, I have a hard time believing a tour guide with a full tour of people will be waiting around for 3 and a half hours instead of continuing their 5 hour journey to the Amazon. Adam is still optimistic, which stops me from panicking too much. I don’t particularly want to stay 2 more days in what people keep referring to as “a shitty city” before being able to book another tour.

So this is where we are! I’m on the bus and it’s quarter after midnight. I have supposedly 12 more hours on this bus and the guy sitting in front of me smells like he hasn’t showered in a month. I could smell his body odor LONG before he reclined his chair into my lap, held his arms up above his head and had his hands touching my bent up knees. Luckily, we are right next to the bathrooms, so the sour body odor smell is occasionally masked with the smell of bus toilet. (If you’ve never experienced this scent, it’s a must!). I have no idea where we are, or when we’ll be getting off, but Adam hopes that when he wakes up, we’ll be lucky enough to “just be there”. At least one of us is optimistic! Here’s to hoping he’s right this time 🙂